Ramblings

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I was having an otherwise long, wearisome day yesterday that brightened when I finally got to pick Rose up from daycare. There is nothing that quite lifts the spirit than to see your child just light up in absolute bliss when they see you. Everyday I think I will get used to it and I don't. Being a mother has it's challenges for sure but it is so dang worth it to me, the sleepless nights, getting my glasses repeatedly ripped off my face, the puke stains...despite all that, it's still worth it. 

On the way home I accidentally got stuck in school traffic. Like a total standstill. But I was, surprisingly not annoyed by this. Instead I found myself watching the kids pool out of the elementary school, squealing and telling their parents excitedly about there day. It really made me smile, which after the craptacular day I had been going through, was definitely something. 

It made me think about my little baby in the backseat and how she would one day be going to kindergarten, a backpack crammed full of school supplies and a carefully prepared lunch. How we would agonize together the night before about the perfect first-day-of-school outfit. I know this mama is gonna cry for sure. Best just to accept that for what it is. Thankfully I have a few years before we cross that bridge but even now, I know how slippery time can be. I look back at pictures of when we first brought Rosie home and it's hard to believe how much she's grown. I mean, dude, she has a tooth now! She doesn't even want any help from anyone to hold her bottle. She can do it all by herself thankyouverymuch. 

I must sound like a broken record. But the surprise of watching her grow, yeah, add that to the list of things you never get used to as a parent. And I don't want to ever take this time for granted. People often say "savor this time while their young" and it kind of freaks me out because I know once the moment passes, the first tooth, the first word, etc etc it's over. That's why, I guess, if I am to really be focusing on anything these days it's to be on living in the moment. Not stressing about the murky shadows of the distant future nor dwelling on the shoulda, woulda coulda's of the past. 

Just. This. Moment.